I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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