Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Randomize