It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
