He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
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