Kareoke will never be a sober sport
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Randomize