There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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