Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
