Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize