nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
handjob tips. give me some.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
