I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
