we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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