First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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