I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Randomize
