so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
