i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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