I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
