that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
