When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
