Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
