that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
