i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
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The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
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