i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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