Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
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