I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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