i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Randomize