mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize