Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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