Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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