I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
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