Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
birth control should be required to get into college
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
