D3 body, D1 cock
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
It all started with a game of naked twister.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
