Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
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i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
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I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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