Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
