that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
