Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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