nut hugger
Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Randomize
