Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
It's Friday. Sex?
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
