Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize