i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
