No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Randomize
