is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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