i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
