New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
