I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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