"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
