and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize