He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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