Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
