Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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