People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
