you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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