remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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